I've always prided myself on making my home a very welcoming one. The best compliment you can give me is to tell me that my house is cozy and that you feel at home here. That's the whole point of my decor, kick up your feet and wrap this chenille throw around your shoulders and let's get down to gossiping. But, there comes a time when I want to throw everyone out my front door, not unlike the cat in the Flintstones.
Here is a handy li'l tip sheet that should get you through the holidays (or rather, should keep me from killing you during the holidays):
Don't Be Late. It's so rude. If your hostess tells you to be somewhere at a certain time, then by God, be there around that time. Don't make her stand there, with her thumb up her ass (unless that's what she's into) waiting. Because unbeknown to you, there are a few things going on. She has likely locked her kids in the basement as to not mess up the house, so the sooner you get there, the sooner the children can come out. Also, there is most likely cooking & baking going on and the longer you delay, the more dried out and overdone the food is going to be. Lastly, she's probably very well-liked and chances are, she has somewhere else to go, once you've left. Be considerate, don't be late.
Don't Be Early. Also very rude. And quite presumptuous as well....you assume you know her well enough to see her without makeup? You don't. All you're doing is making the process harder for her. Knowing what a fabulous hostess she is, a lot goes into the presentation of a party.
Bring What You Say You're Going To Bring, regarding the dish to pass. The hostess plans her menu around what you told her you were going to bring. Don't tell her you're going to bring 2 bottles of wine and then just bring one. Don't tell her you're going to bring a baguette and then bring a loaf of wheat--it's hardly the same. And for God's sake, don't ask for a doggy bag. Unless the hostess insists that you bring home whatever you've brought, don't pack it up and bring it home with you. Ugh..so gauche. Lastly, if you're family consists of 2 adults and 5 kids, don't bring chips & dip and call it good. Perhaps, bring things for your kids to munch on so that you're hostess doesn't have to scrounge through her pantry trying to find Carter and Spencer something to eat during her party. I'm just saying.
Help out. Meaning, when you're done eating, take your plate to the kitchen and hey, here's a thought, maybe put it in the dishwasher. Go that extra mile and rinse it off first. Leaving it for the hostess to clear while you lay on the couch and watch tv isn't helping. You brought 6 kids with you....help them out too, by wiping their hands off so they don't run around leaving greasy hand prints all over everything.
Don't ask, just do. "Do you want me to empty the garbage". No, no, just continue piling things onto it. Eventually, it will topple over and then I'll have something else to do. JUST DO IT.
This is all common sense, people. It's not like I'm writing a manual of how I want my house detailed (you wouldn't do it right, anyway). It's just basic etiquette. So that entails my list of being a stellar guest.
And just for good measure, I'd like to add a darling, little anecdote with regard to my in-laws and their holiday traditions (I don't ALWAYS host. Sometimes the cute, little, Mexicans do it). This is something that's been going on, under the radar, for as long as I've been with my husband (13 yrs). It's never been brought up until now. I find it necessary to address it. With my in-laws, it's all about the dish-to-pass. Mexicans are all about tradition, so if you bring something that everyone likes, it will be expected at each holiday. I have to admit, I reek of pride when my mother-in-law requests that I make a particular dish. I'll get downright smug about it. I will, too. When I first got in with the family, I tried impressing them with some fancy dish or another and if it flopped, I wouldn't know about it until the next year, when they'd demote me to pop....or worse, rolls. Oh, sure, they'd all tell me it was delicious, but the truth would come out the following year when I'd obnoxiously ask if anyone wanted my chocolate truffle. "oh, Leslie, why go to all that trouble....just bring a dozen rolls". So, I'd be right back at the bottom again and it would take years to build my reputation back up again. You think I'm kidding? Oh, I've paid my dues. It starts with rolls, then pop, then salad, then you finally move up to the main dishes. If a new family member marries into the family and right off the bat, she is assigned a casserole..I know something is up and you can expect a throw-down at that point. I won't stand for nepotism...not in this family. No, there's a hierarchy with the dish-to-pass. Usually pop & rolls are reserved for the college students and/or girlfriends, then the salad goes to the new wives and then maybe, just maybe you'll be able to break through that glass ceiling into casseroles.
Hope this finds all my loyal readers surviving the wretched holiday season. I find that humor, mixed with copius amounts of sedatives help to get me by.
:-)
No comments:
Post a Comment