People we hate

Listing the people that we love is..well, boring. So, we'll list the people that we hate. It's very simple, there are those who "get it" and those who don't. It's all black and white, we are 'love it' or 'hate it' girls, there's no grey. Lee interjecting here. I think it is important to note that in our family, it was kill or be killed. Around the dinner table, if we didn't have something nasty to say about someone, there would be hell to pay. We would get extra points for ripping on someone outside the family. I guess it's how dear 'ol dad made himself feel better about his pathetic life. Here goes:



1. People who talk and talk and talk, just for the sake of hearing their own voice. What is coming out of their mouth is neither remarkable nor entertaining. They truly think that if they throw in a 4 syllable word every so often, it will create the illusion that they are intelligent. I usually see right through that and then instantly hate them.



2. People who have no minds of their own. Their likes and dislikes parallel their spouse/girlfriend/boyfriend. This falls into the same category as people who can't NOT have a spouse/girlfriend/boyfriend and also people who worship their spouse/girlfriend/boyfriend. Puke. I have no patience or tolerance for this type of person. They are usually very meek and boring individuals. We are also not so fond of people who can ONLY talk about their children. We love our children to death, however, we don't expect others to love them as much as we do nor do we expect others to find their silly antics as fabulous as we do.



3. Trista Sutter (A.K.A the Bachelorette). She got dissed on the Bachelor and then went on the Bachelorette where she found true love and married him on National TV (which funded her 1 Million dollar wedding). Then went onto be a spokesperson for infertility within weeks of her nuptiuals. She began writing a column for Redbook magazine....something about being married, or something (because she was obviously an expert after 3 months of marriage). Blew out her fallopian tubes and was knocked up the following month. Got her fat ass onto any magazine that would shoot her revealed her story book nursery. And is now on the cover of every cheap grocery store magazine as the poster girl for post-pregnancy weight loss. Go away! Your 7 minutes were up in 2001. I don't care for the girl or her wussy husband either. I just don't care enough to waste one milisecond on thinking about it. Shut up. If you don't have anything bitchy to day, don't say anything at all.



4. Cashiers who comment on everything that you buy. "Oh, this looks delicious, where did you find this". Just ring me up, Shannon--thanks! Also--cashiers that complain about their jobs while they're ringing you up. I don't know why, but this makes me insane. "hello, how are you today, Target person"? "I'll be a lot better when I get to punch out of this place". I never know how to respond to that. Grocery store cashiers who throw my food to the end of the whatever it is you call it after charging me for it make me mental. I'm hyperventilating just thinking about it! It's called a conveyour belt, donkey.



5. People who use poor grammar. This includes:

• He don't know...
• I seen him at the Walmart last week.
• You ain't got no dang money!
• Where you at?
• Irregardless...(you just know this person thinks they're using a big word and don't you just want to slap them)?
• I have went....
• People who prounounce Illinois as El-in-oy and industry as IN-dustry. OMG I need a drink!
  

6. People who have their kids in public still in their pajamas in the afternoon. This gives me hives. Is it really that hard to dress your child. This includes people who refuse to brush their kids hair and the kid shows up to school with the biggest rat's nest in the back of their head. Also--the people in the middle of the Summer who push their kids around in a grocery cart wearing nothing but a diaper.

7. Chris Hansen from Dateline. You know the "To Catch A Predator". He's so..... "Enough about you, I'm Chris Hansen, do you like my hair". "Well, we'll get to you in a minute, Long-schlong-228, right now, I'd like to introduce myself, but surely you've seen me on T.V, I'm Chris Hansen. Don't I look better in person?"

8. People who can't muster up the strawn-th to shake your hand. It's like shaking hands with an invalid. It's all limp and damp. They're the worst.

9. People who can't make a point. There's a word for this and it's called "circuitous". Good one, eh? Learn it. Use it. Impress your friends with it. I can't stand when people mistake me for a stupid person and take 3 hours to explain the most simple concept. I usually have to put the phone down and pinch the bridge of my nose, pour myself a drink and then eventually pick the phone back up again to see if they've progressed any further into the story. I have no patience for circuitous people. My mother used to do this when she'd explain recipes to me. She'd explain each layer of lasagne as if each one was different from the one before. Instead of saying, 'sauce, lasagne, meat, cheese, sauce....layer it 3 times, etc.' She'd start her recipe directions at the grocery store and finish at how to clean up baked on grease. Maddening, I tell you.