Homemade Costumes and Life's Other Failures
I'll just say it. It stinks being friends with such talented, domestic ladies. So, once a year, my ego goes down the drain because I can't produce a decent Halloween costume for my son. I refuse to buy the store bought ones because they're paper thin and look cheap, so I insist on making my own. In December, my 6 year old tells me he wants to be Mario (from Mario Brothers) for Halloween. I thought, 'what a perfectly precious and totally original idea'. That is, until I find out that half his class is being Mario. So, I begged and bribed him to change his mind, but his mind was made up. He was to be Mario.
I first began my search at Halloween U.S.A. Amid their 9,000 costumes, there was no Mario to be found. So, my next stop was to Target or Walmart to try and find blue sweats with a matching shirt. I would simply cut off the sleeves & collar and voila...he'd have overalls. Well, because I refuse to allow my boys to wear "sweatsuits" I failed to realize that they don't make those anymore (rightfully so). So, the salesperson says, "you'd be better off just making the costume". I was intrigued. Make it you say? Like with an actual sewing machine? Hmm. Go on, I'm listening. So, she starts by telling me to grab a pattern for a basic pajama bottom. Whoa, whoa, slow down there, you're talking all crazy, I say. Talk to me like I'm a 4 year old, I tell her. So, bless her heart, she walks me through step by step and assures me there's nothing in the world easier than sewing pajama bottoms. I felt confident. That was weeks ago and I placed all the material, patterns and whatnots up in my hall closet and each time I opened that closet, there it was. Starring at me.
I finally tackled it yesterday and whipped it out in less than an hour. I was so proud of myself. I called my son over to try it on. I should have known it was going to be a disaster when I had to roll his pant leg on like they were nylons. The "overalls" were so tight on this poor child, he could barely walk. My husband calls from the other room, "did you leave enough room for him to wear jeans underneath---it's going to be cold, you know". Right. The boy moved one inch and the shoulder strap ripped. Don't move, I tell him. So, he's shuffling around our kitchen, he's walking like a mermaid, he can't move his arms and my husband is shaking his head in disgust. "He can't wear that to school" he tells me. I offer, "well, it's not a wedding dress, it's just a Halloween costume for heaven's sake". I rolled the costume off of his tiny, little body, where it is still hanging up in my hall closet. I'm considering home schooling at this point, as to avoid my poor baby having to parade around his elementary school in that horrendous excuse for a costume. Next year he's being a ghost.
I'll just say it. It stinks being friends with such talented, domestic ladies. So, once a year, my ego goes down the drain because I can't produce a decent Halloween costume for my son. I refuse to buy the store bought ones because they're paper thin and look cheap, so I insist on making my own. In December, my 6 year old tells me he wants to be Mario (from Mario Brothers) for Halloween. I thought, 'what a perfectly precious and totally original idea'. That is, until I find out that half his class is being Mario. So, I begged and bribed him to change his mind, but his mind was made up. He was to be Mario.
I first began my search at Halloween U.S.A. Amid their 9,000 costumes, there was no Mario to be found. So, my next stop was to Target or Walmart to try and find blue sweats with a matching shirt. I would simply cut off the sleeves & collar and voila...he'd have overalls. Well, because I refuse to allow my boys to wear "sweatsuits" I failed to realize that they don't make those anymore (rightfully so). So, the salesperson says, "you'd be better off just making the costume". I was intrigued. Make it you say? Like with an actual sewing machine? Hmm. Go on, I'm listening. So, she starts by telling me to grab a pattern for a basic pajama bottom. Whoa, whoa, slow down there, you're talking all crazy, I say. Talk to me like I'm a 4 year old, I tell her. So, bless her heart, she walks me through step by step and assures me there's nothing in the world easier than sewing pajama bottoms. I felt confident. That was weeks ago and I placed all the material, patterns and whatnots up in my hall closet and each time I opened that closet, there it was. Starring at me.
I finally tackled it yesterday and whipped it out in less than an hour. I was so proud of myself. I called my son over to try it on. I should have known it was going to be a disaster when I had to roll his pant leg on like they were nylons. The "overalls" were so tight on this poor child, he could barely walk. My husband calls from the other room, "did you leave enough room for him to wear jeans underneath---it's going to be cold, you know". Right. The boy moved one inch and the shoulder strap ripped. Don't move, I tell him. So, he's shuffling around our kitchen, he's walking like a mermaid, he can't move his arms and my husband is shaking his head in disgust. "He can't wear that to school" he tells me. I offer, "well, it's not a wedding dress, it's just a Halloween costume for heaven's sake". I rolled the costume off of his tiny, little body, where it is still hanging up in my hall closet. I'm considering home schooling at this point, as to avoid my poor baby having to parade around his elementary school in that horrendous excuse for a costume. Next year he's being a ghost.
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