Graysen

I was at the mall today with Gabe (the almost 5 yr old) and since he was good, I allowed him to play in the little play area, which I call the  E Coli Pit.

I'm sitting on the bench, half watching him, half checking out facebook on my phone.  This OBNOXIOUS mother is sitting next to me and this is what she sounds like, " Graysen, hi honey. Hi Graysen.  Pull up your pants, Graysen.  Good boy, Graysen, good boy! Ooooh, be careful Graysen, you scared me.  (Gasp) Graysen...are you ok, honey?  GRAYSEN...ARE YOU ALRIGHT, ARE YOU HURT??".   Ok, Graysen is about 5 and there is absolutely nothing in the E Coli pit that could possibly hurt him. It's padded, carpeted and everything is soft plastic.  She's the epitome of the hovering helicopter mom.  And you know how much I love the helicopter moms.  She was so annoying the way she was smothering him.

The little f-er kept following Gabe all over the place.  Usually that wouldn't bother Gabe, but this kid was hot on his trail for about 15 minutes and ya know....that could get old.  So, Gabe said, "how come you're following me"?  So, Graysen's mom gets all indignant, "Graysen, baby...come here and see mommy".   I continue to ignore Graysen and his loser mother.  Gabe comes over to me and tells me that he doesn't want that little boy following him anymore.  I explain that "Graysen" can play wherever he chooses and just to go play and be a nice boy.

 I look back down at my phone for 3 seconds and this is what I hear from Robo-Mom: "NOOOO, NOOOOO....GET YOUR HANDS OFF OF HIM, THAT WASN'T NICE----YOU SAY YOU'RE SORRY NOW".  I refuse to look up because I don't want her to think I'm being nosy, when she leans over, (hysterically) and says to me in the most theatrical voice, "YOUR SON JUST GRABBED MY SON!!!"  It was said in the tone that someone would say, "YOUR BABY...HE'S ON THE ROOF AND IT LOOKS LIKE HE MIGHT JUMP".  I looked up at her and I was caught off guard.  I was totally thinking she was yelling at "Graysen" but it took a minute for it to sink in that she was screaming at Gabe.  So, I calmly called Gabe over and asked him what he did and he said, "I squeezed his arm because he wouldn't stop following me".  Now, with that said, I am never one to back down from disciplining my children.  You all know about the beatings, right?  I'm no stranger to punishment, so it's not like I'm one of those moms that's like, "now precious, put down the knife and untie mommmy". 

 I pat Gabe on the head and send him on his way and tell him to " go have fun".  I watch him walk away and that's when I noticed Graysen's mom following him through the little play area.  It seemed as if she was playing 'Following the Leader" with Graysen.  If Graysen jumped off of the 12 inch platform, mom jumped behind him, to ensure that he wouldn't get hurt (again, Graysen is approx. 5 years old----therefore perfectly capable of walking and not falling down).  She was man-handling him like a marionette.  I began this blog while I was sitting there.....it was just going to be about an obnoxious mother,  but it turned out to be much, much more. Yay for  me.  I always welcome new material. 

As I left the play area, Graysen's mom was glaring at me and I threw this comment in her general direction, "I just twittered about you", and scurried away.  I'm so proud of me-self.

I'm going to go out on a limb and assume that Graysen is an only child.  I'll also assume Graysen's dad left about 4 years and 11 mos. ago. 

Ooooh, I so badddd.